I’m just here

I’m at a complete and utter loss for words. The pain is dragging me down so far down. I want to crawl into a hole and just die never come out. I have no desire to do anything. Breathing is excrutiating. My stomach clenches My entire body just shakes Everything starts to spin I’m loosing […]


Today has been nothing but anger. Pure rage really. To many pregnancy annoucements that just plain hurt. 6 to be exact. Each one stung just a little bit more. I hate that they hurt. I hate that I can’t be happy. I don’t wish this on anyone, I really don’t. I just want it to […]


You held me down but I got up get ready cause I’ve had enough. Here my voice you hear that sound, like thunder gonna shake the ground. I got the eye if the tiger a fighter dancing through the fire cause I am the champion and you’re going to hear me roar. My grief chant. […]

Grief attacks

I’m fine. Planning my day. Sometimes I’m just talking, I’ll be fine I’ll feel happy, sometimes I’m in the car and a song comes on and triggers it, or I see a baby out and think oh. A movie or a show will be a trigger. Anything can trigger it. Little cracks where the full […]